Rebuilding Amanda

- Amanda.
- Married to a handsome man.
- Pittsburgh native.
- Recently relocated to Georgia.
- Mama to three adorable kitties.
- Working on rebuilding herself.

This afternoon, I got a call from the program director/owner of Focus. She asked me to call her back ASAP, or stop by her office. I was a bit freaked out, but I was already at the office so I decided that whatever was gonna happen should happen in person. She had me come in and sit down, and by this time I am freaked out to the max and my anxiety is super high and I’m going “oh god she’s gonna fire me I’m done.”

She then blows me out of the water and goes “we had the county courthouse call us and ask if we had someone who could contract out with them to provide assessments and therapy and such at the court house. They want someone for 20-25 hours a week. I instantly thought of you, so I wanted to ask if you were interested in this position.”

So I am sitting there and I’m in shock that the OWNER of this accredited firm I work for picked ME out of everyone who works there for this opportunity. She was like “you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, but I figured you might want the hours and the chance to really get in with the court system and make a name for yourself.” I immediately told her I would take the position, and she said she would let them know and then make sure she nailed down exactly the hours and times they would want me. She told me I would still be responsible for my caseload, but it won’t really be an issue for me because I see the majority of my clients after 3 or 4 in the afternoon anyways, and I would be at the courthouse in the morning/early afternoon. She told me I would have to go for an interview but that because they were contracting me out (she called it pimping lol), it was a for sure thing.

I’m very excited. I feel like things are coming together! If this happens, I’m going to quit peachford at the end of September because the extra hours would make me more money than working weekends at the hospital….so I would have weekends free! I’m so excited.

I feel like I have maybe found my little niche and I’m very happy.

"I was told
The average girl begins to plan her wedding at the age of 7
She picks the colors and the cake first

By the age of 10 
She knows time,
And location

By 17 
She’s already chosen a gown
2 bridesmaids
And a maid of honor

By 23 
She’s waiting for a man
Who wont break out in hives when he hears the word “commitment”
Someone who doesn’t smell like a Band-Aid drenched in lonely
Someone who isn’t a temporary solution to the empty side of the bed
Who’ll hold her hand like it’s the only one they’ve ever seen

To be honest
I don’t know what kind of tux I’ll be wearing
I have no clue what my wedding will look like

But I imagine
The women who pins my last name to hers
Will butterfly down the aisle
Like a 5 foot promise

I imagine
Her smile
Will be so large that you’ll see it on google maps
And know exactly where our wedding is being held

The woman that I plan to marry
Will have champagne in her walk
And I will get drunk on her footsteps

When the pastor asks
If I take this woman to be my wife
I will say yes before he finishes the sentence
I’ll apologize later for being impolite
But I will also explain to him
That our first kiss happened 6 years ago
And I’ve been practicing my “Yes”
For the past 2, 165 days

When people ask me about my wedding
I never really know what to say
But when they ask me about my future wife
I always tell them
Her eyes are the only Christmas lights that deserve to be seen all year long
I say
She thinks too much
Misses her father
Loves to laugh
And she’s terrible at lying
Because her face never figured out how to do it correctly

I tell them
If my alarm clock sounded like her voice
My snooze button would collect dust
I tell them

If she came in a bottle
I would drink her until my vision is blurry and my friends take away my keys
If she was a book

I would memorize her table of contents
I would read her cover-to-cover
Hoping to find typos

Just so we can both have a few things to work on

Because aren’t we all unfinished?
Don’t we all need a little editing?
Aren’t we all waiting to be proofread by someone?
Aren’t we all praying they will tell us that we make sense
She don’t always make sense
But her imperfections are the things I love about her the most

I don’t know when I will be married
I don’t know where I will be married
But I do know this
Whenever I’m asked about my future wife

I always say
…She’s a lot like you

Rudy Francisco (via katcossio)

(via quixoticandabsurd)




I almost forgot my briefcase!

it contains important lab results

LOL this puppy is like.



The fuck.

Are you doing. 

Daily accountability. I emailed fitbit support about my fitbit continuously dying much quick than it should be. Hopefully I hear back from them soon!

Here’s to a good week!

Told you I was clearly hard at work at the hospital!

Also, whoever schedules me to run a group at 4pm for an hour plus do all of the groups notes when I’m supposed to leave at 5pm can go kick rocks. Guess it’s extra money, but still.

Thoughts at work:

I think I’m going to start a 5k plan. Focus is running a super-hero 5k at the end of October as a team, and I think I want to do it. Like not just walk it. So that’s a thought.

I think I need to keep a written food journal. I’ve never been able to keep one for more than a few days before falling off the Wagon again. However, I want to also keep track in order to figure out these stomach issues that are happening again.

On stomach issues: yep, they’re back. Fun times. I also have been having episodes of heart burn and acid reflux lately, which is something I have never really had. I’m assuming it’s my diet causing all this crap (pun not intended). Hopefully journaling my food and how I feel afterwards will help me identify more of the problem foods.

(Clearly I’m working hard today.)

I think I’ll go home tonight and fit a 5k plan into my schedule for this week. Yep. Sounds like a plan.